Tuesday, October 7, 2008

The best (and worst) hangover story

So I promised one of my friends - and favorite blogger - that I would write a post about my worst hangover. Though embarrassing, it's for a good cause. Check out the link at the end of the post for more information on the dangers of binge drinking.

But in the meantime, enjoy hearing of the agony that ensued after my 21st birthday.

Luckily (or unlucky, depending on how you look at it) my 21st fell on a Saturday. And as all you current and former college partiers know, this means that you get to live it up as soon as the clock strikes midnight and head to the bar for your first legal tequila shot...or, at least that's how it worked out for me.

Being a Michigan State University student, I knew how to throw a good party, so the BFF and I planned a jungle juice party at my apartment. We supplied the 20 gallon container and the fruit, our friends under 21 brought the juice and those who were 21+ brought a 5th of liquor, any kind.

Insanity ensued:

8 p.m. - friends arrive and we pour the first glass of juice.

8 - 11:55 p.m. - I sit on the kitchen counter, directly next to the liquid poison, standing only to hug the newest arriving guests - until I realized standing is not needed - and picked out the liquor soaked fruit between refills.

11:56 p.m. - I am plucked from the counter by my friend Ryan and find myself crammed in a car full of men, of which I only know one.

11:57 p.m. - I get on the phone and call my boyfriend and the BFF, telling them to meet us at the Riv.

11:59 p.m. - we park the car and walk to the Riv.

12:00 a.m. - 12:45 a.m. - Stand in line. See one of my old friends from freshman year, proceed to tell him he should wait with us...that's about all I remember from that line.

12:45 a.m. - get to the front of the line, only to find out they won't let me in because it's my birthday and I'm quite obviously already drunk.

12:46 a.m. - I curse all those frat boys who made their brothers do 21 shots on their birthday and ruin it for the rest of us.

12:46 a.m. - 12:47 p.m. - walk to the Post, it's directly across the street.

12:47 a.m. - get in and immediately walk to the ladies room.

12:49 a.m. - a tap on the shoulder from my friend Rob brings the first tequila shot of the night, in the ladies room.

12:51 a.m. - second tequila shot is waiting, followed by a 3 wise men.

12:52 - 1:30 a.m. - somehow I manage 4 more tequila shots, and almost another before I stopped and noted that in fact I could not feel my skin and thought it a bad idea - the smartest drunk decision I ever made!

1:30 a.m. - head for the ladies room.

1:31 - 1:34 a.m. - decide the line is too long and use the men's - no one seemed to care.

1:35 - 1:45 a.m. - miller high life, not sure that I even finished it...yuck!

1:45 a.m. - bar closes, attempt to walk back to Nicole's car, the best DD in the world!

1:46 a.m. - notice I said attempt:

(When the BFF drinks he loves to carry people - though I didn't mind so much!)

1:50 a.m. - we pile into Nicole's car, me lying across the laps of 4 guys in the backseat.

1:53 a.m. - arrive back that the apartment, I'm tipped up and out of the car - just in time (you get my drift).

1:58 a.m. - I walk back into my apartment, with much assistance from my boyfriend. Walk inside to notice my friend Mike sitting on the balcony, drinking jungle juice. He mentions that when he arrived no one was here but the door was unlocked because I had the key and left first - thank God for Mike.

2:05 - 2:35 a.m. - much time spent praying to the porcelain gods.

2:35 - 2:40 a.m. - boyfriend scrapes me off the floor to say goodbye to Mike. He sets me on my bed and gets pillows and blankets for our guests before coming to bed.

9:30 a.m. - open eyes, lay still, seem okay. Sun light hurts a little. Roll over an notice I'm not wearing a shirt. Get up quickly (big mistake) to put one on and crawl back into bed, miserable.

9:35 a.m. - friends come in (thankfully I got up to put on a shirt!) to say they made pancakes.

Me: "Do I look like I want pancakes?"

9:45 a.m. - my head and stomach are killing me. I make my boyfriend get up to get me some cheerios.

9:50 a.m. - boyfriend is stacking cheerios on his nipples...he may have still been drunk.

10 a.m. - friends leave, boyfriend and I go back to sleep.

2 p.m. - wake and go for a walk, hoping to feel better before dinner with my parents.

5 p.m. - mexican restaurant with the family.

Mom: "I want to buy you your first margarita!"

Me: "Ugh, I think I'll pass, thanks!"

Mom: "What happened last night?"

Boyfriend: "You don't want to know."

Truth. This goes to show just a few of the harmful effects of binge drinking. So to all you readers out there, Don't be a Jonze.

So tell me dear readers, does anyone else have a similar, or worse, hangover story?

Cheers!

-A

9 comments:

Ben said...

Cheerio nipples? I'd act shocked but I think that would happen after one of my parties too.

even pretty girls need to read said...

Ash - I also celebrated my 21st bday in East Lansing. I got free drink tickets at Rick's with the explicit instructions not to throw up and then wasn't let into 131 because it was my birthday...Also, just want to be clear, that's your worst story? My hangover stories eat your story for breakfast. Not that that is a competition I am proud of winning.

Ashley said...

ben - I think cheerio nipples is my favorite part of the story.

claire - 131 and Harpers are known for not letting people in. To clarify, that was the story of my worst hangover, not the best hangover story I have...that's about all I'll say about that.

Anonymous said...

I don't get how you could not eat pancakes, but you could eat cheerios? I would have needed a cheesesteak.

I repeated kindergarten so I am older than most in my grade. Therefore, I was one of the first to turn 21. It was in the summer and I had to work at both my jobs the next day. Because I lived in a dry town, I sat in a booth at Chilis with my under 21 friends, except for one who kept buying me drinks.

It was a good time though - and I definitely made up for it when school started in Sept.

Anonymous said...

Ashley-

Good story. I too had (maybe) one too many on my 21st bday. I went out on a Wednesday night at midnight, celebrated until the crack of dawn, then slept through my statistics exam the actual day of my bday. Definitely a lesson learned there- (but thanks to the MSU curve scale, i still 4.0'd the class!)

Maxie said...

I have some pretty bad hangover stories... I just need to find the best one to write about.

alexa @clevelandsaplum said...

haha. oh ashley!

im still not sharing mine though : )

Ashley said...

transienttravels - I was beyond the point of craving greasy and fatty foods. I wasn't sure I'd be able to hold anything down at all.

michael - ah, a mid-week 21st - those are always deadly when you're at MSU.

maxie - can't wait to hear..nothing shy of entertaining I'm sure.

alexa - you should do a blog swap like ben suggested, then of course tell me which on it is because I can only imagine! :-)

Ben said...

[...Let's check out the entries, shall we?...]

http://bensprblog.blogspot.com/2008/10/no-ordinary-hangover-binge-bloggers.html