Thursday, September 11, 2008

A blessing and a curse

As I've mentioned before, tailgating season is one of my favorites. There's nothing like going home, catching up with old roommates, friends from college and even high school. It seems that no matter how long it's been, we always pick up right where we left off, Miller Lite in hand.

Homecoming weekend never ceases to amaze me as I run into old friends along Grand River (Mike B. if you're reading this, I expect nothing less than to see you in EL again this year, bow tie and all), bounce from tailgate to tailgate, and attend kegs 'n eggs three days in a row to catch up with my dearest fellow alumni.

At the end of the weekend we all jump in our cars or head to the airport to make it back to our real world jobs, hangovers and all. This, my friends, is always a sad reality.


A strange phenomenon happened the year I graduated from undergrad - my friends and I all got big kid jobs. After going through four years of college, wondering what would be in store for us (given that our older siblings struggled mercilessly to find employment after the bubble burst), we all moved on to new places and new adventures - spread far and wide across the country.

(great times were had by all)

Within weeks of graduation I was off to Texas while my dearest friends were packing up and moving to LA, Denver, Chicago, Madison, Indianapolis, Florida, Detroit, North Carolina, Minneapolis...the list goes on. Most of us went on to explore our new worlds alone, sole Spartans on a mission. Others went in pairs, at most.

The situation seemed great - I can visit my friends all over the country, whenever I want. But as the years pass, and I continue to move around the country in search of the perfect city, I wonder if in fact this was a blessing, or a curse. And each year, as the number of friends that return for homecoming festivities dwindles, I continue to lean toward the latter.

The question becomes, then, how does one keep these vastly divided groups of friends as close as they once were while meeting, growing, and thriving in new social circles in this ever so hectic 'adult' life?

What has worked for you, in keeping those friends as close as ever?

For now, it's back to social networking in an attempt to plan the best homecoming tailgate ever.

Cheers!

-A

8 comments:

Ben said...

I really wish it were easier to make time for each other now that we're getting busier and moving further apart. I'm all for hearing people's suggestions on this one too.

I've started booking people for annual things like cottage trips and the like. Hopefully that'll work.

Cam said...

A, you are much too nice to me. But your encouragement is much appreciated and has given me a boost in confidence to start some work-related blogging.

As for today's post, I completely understand and have no words of wisdom. My college friends are scattered all over and its becoming more difficult to meet up and keep in touch. I'm the one who can't make it back for homecoming this year. (so sad!!)

I think you should all try to commit to getting together at least once a year. Rent a cabin, go to the beach, meet up at homecoming.

We've started taking turns hosting everyone in our new cities. So far we've meet up in Denver, Dallas and Kansas City and it's been a fun, and cheap way (no hotel costs!) to hang out a few times a year.

Jennie said...

As lame as this might sound FB. I have a really great group of friends from high school and the majority of us has been apart at different colleges and now jobs since college, but we will start a group message to everyone and it has not only provided quite a bit of comic relief but its really easy for us to plan events to meet up together and continue to keep updated on each other's lives.

But I also have to agree with the last two posts that either annual trips or holiday events that everyone tries to adhere to are really helpful. This smae high school group always spends New Years together and one of us has a job on a cruise line starting in the spring and we are now trying to plan a trip to get together to see him in action and visit again.

Anonymous said...

UTSA undefeated!

alexa @clevelandsaplum said...

once all your friends start getting married you will get to see them all the time.

the last few years while having been expensive with travel costs have allowed me and all my friends to see each other quite often.

Narm said...

Guilt trips. Lots of guilt trips.

So@24 said...

I'm going back to homecoming for the first time since I graduated.

My frat has an alumni cocktail every year.

May God have mercy on my soul.

Ashley said...

ben - homecoming has been our yearly gathering, but an annual trip is a good idea - makes them commit without being able to easily bail out at the last minute.

cc - keep me posted on how the blog is coming. Meet ups at a friends place in a different city is a great idea - travel and a reunion all in one!

jennie - oooh, a cruise. Too fun! And I'm looking at you for homecoming and/or ND weekend, chica!

anna - this is why I make annual trips to Dallas. Though next time it looks like I'll have one less person to visit. We need to chat so I can catch you up!

alexa - yikes, weddings! I've missed numerous weddings already due to living hours away - especially when I was in Texas.

narm - those have been working surprisingly well lately!

so@24 - you will be in my thoughts and prayers!